Thursday, July 28, 2016

Lissy's Wedding

JUNE 23, 2016

I had the pleasure of attending a beautiful celebration of love. A family friend of mine got married in Delhi, NY at a place called Maple Shade Farm. It was the perfect location for her wedding, and was the best wedding celebration I have ever attended in my short 25 years of life. I think most of that has to do with the fact that I was definitely reliving my childhood and it was a day spent with amazing people from my childhood!

Lissy, like I is a woman raised by a father from Long Island. We met as little kids at her country home that she grew up in, in Stamford NY. Being a homegrown Palenville girl myself, we hit it off playing barefoot in her yard, swimming in her pool, swinging on her tire swing and doing all things kids do in the country in the summer time. As we grew older, life got busy. We have become young women now, finding our way. I am so beyond happy for her and finding Caleb and for them to share a life beyond their wildest dreams together. This wedding was picturesque, and so laid back and real and I wish nothing but the same for their future: a real love that lasts, enjoying every single moment together that life and nature has to offer them!


Some of what made this wedding so great, was the car ride spent up to and back from the wedding with one of my newest, realest friends, Danny. He truly inspires me to be my authentic self, and a friend like that is rare and hard to come by! 

She was a beyond gorgeous bride, her and her dad have something special. Just like me and my dad. Its that Long Island Dad, Raising a country princess kind of love. 
My Mom, Dad and I at the Cocktail hour before the ceremony: 
Long Island Raised 
Country Born
A sporadic friendship 
But never Torn 
Swinging from Tire Swings 
Staring up at the same huge horizon
Running barefoot separately
Finally converging to one barefoot yard, come July 
As the fireworks burst, 
These country raised children feel alive and free 
Knowing deep in their soul they are loved 
Summer sun shining down 
The winding roads of life become real 
As each year is passing 
We find strength 
We find Meaning 
We find love 
Shaped by each Soul that aligns us to the creator 
The lesson, 
The experience of, 
 a Full Child-like Life. 



The kids were running around all day playing with frisbees, corn-hole, in the pond, hula hoops, running around with the dog, it was quite the magical experience for them and us! 
Lissy' Mom, Teri and Caleb! 



May all your dreams come true, beautiful couple, beautiful family. Wishing them all the best and always in the daily prayer and positive thoughts. <3 Thank you for allowing me to be apart of it, I am so beyond grateful to the hospitality of this beautiful family. XOXO 






Friday, July 22, 2016

Fearless Friday.. Confession Within A Confession.. Erin Anne Elizabeth

           Today, I am writing on Friday July 22nd, a lot has happened since my last post, that I will eventually write about. However, today I am being inclined to write about the TRUTH. The TRUTH about insides not always matching outsides. As a human being I know I tend to compare other people's outsides with my insides because that is what the media and FACEBOOK in particular motivates us as a society to do.

          When I was a little girl in third grade, I wrote what I wanted to be when I grew up. It was not just one thing, but three things. When I grow up I want to be a SINGER, a WRITER and an ARTIST. Now, let me tell you, somewhere along the lines of growing up I learned that none of those things will make you any money, unless you already have money to do them. Which, I also learned at a young age, that I and my family had no money. You need to work hard for money. So, that is what I did, I started working in restaurants at the age of 13. I also knew deep within my being that I wanted to help others. That my life's purpose was to help other people. Some way, some how.  Today, I am a person that has ACHIEVED many things, and society is definitely proud of what I look like on paper.  I graduated high school, I traveled to Ireland with family, I participated in recreational sports at college, I dated a military academy man, I received a bachelors degree from a 4 year college, I lived in Alaska on my own, I flew on a private jet and worked for a billionaire doctor, I got my heart broken multiple times, I am strong, eat well, in shape, play sports, and am in school again to receive a nursing degree and hopefully pass my boards and become a nurse.
 
      HOWEVER, somewhere along those lines I lost that inner child of someone who likes to sing and dance in the yard, paint with her fingers, write stories about her life and her feelings. As well as write stories about the amazing people she comes across on a daily basis and who have helped her become this society driven successful super woman. Somewhere along those years I learned that none of those things makes you money, and money creates happiness, apparently.... (At least thats what they all want us to believe). Can I be both that inner child who sings, dances, paints, laughs and writes as well as a super successful nurse who takes care of so many who are suffering, experiencing trauma as well as simultaneously experiencing the trauma alongside with her patients? I believe that YES these two worlds can collide as one and make up the wonderful inner child, yet super successful woman that composes ERIN ANNE ELIZABETH.

BUT, and this is a big BUT, for this woman, that is only achievable through a SERIOUS balance. A balance that is composed of 3 things (my life is always composed of 3, no I can't pick one dream occupation I need 3, I can't have just one best friend I need 3 and the list goes on and on and on). These THREE things are
1. Spiritual Balance
2. Physical Balance
3. Emotional Balance

Ultimately, for this writing what I want to focus on is my emotional balance. I have been diagnosed "Bipolar" in the last 2 years of my life. Is it true? maybe. Did I take medication?  Yes. Do I take medication now? No. Is it ok if you always take medication for something like this diagnosis? Yes. Will I take medication in the future? Its always a possibility. HOWEVER, what I stress is do NOT let a diagnosis define YOU. Whoever YOU are, I choose to identify myself as ERIN ANNE ELIZABETH, the singing, dancing, writing, loving, caring little girl yet successful woman whose mind is communicating with you through her fingers right now.

Did I go through some trauma in the past 2 years to lead up to such a diagnosis? Yes. We all have trauma in our lives. I am currently working through more trauma as I speak (write/type). Trauma will keep happening, change will keep happening, life is a never ending merry go round until we decide to get off or as I believe God decides when we get off. But, like I said I am going to focus on the Emotional balance for this writing.

Here is where the confession comes in. I have been going to  THERAPY for the last 2 years. 2 years ago I used to go twice a week every week. Now I go once every two weeks. And sometimes once every week depending on how life is going. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with this. There is NOTHING wrong with being diagnosed with something, there is NOTHING wrong with asking for help, there is NOTHING wrong with talking to someone who doesn't know you, but can get to know you, the true you,  IF you choose to become completely honest. (because honestly its the only way to get sufficient help) Until you LET GO of the facade you are trying to put on for the approval of others, you will never truly achieve true peace of yourself from within or true help from anyone else for that matter. And HONESTLY I still, two years later teeter totter back and forth between my facade and my true identity, its was makes us all human. We are all just trying to figure out who we are, where we stand and who we want to be.

As a health professional, I truly believe that MENTAL HEALTH is the answer to most of our ailments. We all need help emotionally, we have all been through at least one devastating thing that has made our heads spin and if we didn't have the tools or tools from our families to handle it in a positive way it can lead to diagnosis after diagnosis and pill after pill because that is what society preaches, a quick fix for a more deep underlying problem and then it all just gets worse. Remember, I do work in the field and I do work with some smart amazing people, however, I just know that there is a more holistic approach to medicine then what mainstream society is allowing and preaching. and that is a whole different topic that I honestly have done no research on and don't want to get into..

Mainly what this writing was about, was for me to be fearless today, write about who I truly am and what is truly going on. I confess, I wanted to be a WRITER, a SINGER and an ARTIST.  I go to THERAPY twice a month and I am a DIAGNOSED bipolar person. I choose not to let any of these things define me in a negative way. I am a fearless woman of dignity today, hoping to help at least one other person with my open-ness, and let you know that it is OK to be YOU. It is OK to have a diagnosis and it is OK to start over and be who you truly want to become. Life is too short to spend precious time making money that isn't even going to be spent on the thing you enjoy like dancing in a field of flowers with paint all over your hands and a poem in your heart.

Happy Friday, Happy Day. Whoever read this and made it all the way through, I applaud you and appreciate you. Thanks for putting up with my all over the place brain. hahah

Love always,

Erin Anne Elizabeth



Saturday, June 11, 2016

Life Quote

I came across this on Facebook today while I was reading about Christina Grimmie. I thought it was truly fitting and wanted to share it on here. It is fitting for all days on this wonderful rollercoaster we call life!

Patti, The Pearl of Wisdom Visits New York for the 2nd Time!

Patti- My Confidant, My spiritual guide, My Friend for the last 3 years. 
Cap- I decided to use your muse for my first post, as well as an inspiring woman to me! Thank you for keeping on me to start my blog. It is because of these amazing two people Patti and Cap, that I am deciding to pursue this blogging endeavor and not just talk about it, but actually DO it. Procrastination leads to paralysis right, CAP? *WINK*  

Yesterday, Patti and I were able to spend the day together. She has been to my home in Palenville, NY before, almost two years ago in October. Many things have changed since two years ago and she has been well aware and apart of the process of changes in my life wholeheartedly supporting me every step of the way. We had a beautiful day enjoying each other's experience strength and hope. A wonderful meeting among friends of mine and who soon became hers in just an hour. The sunshine warming our shoulders.  Reminiscing through the lessons of the past as we see them now presently and how they shaped us into the women we are today. Being able to relate to another woman and share open and honestly with them is one of the most amazing gifts this life and God has ever given me. 
   
      If I had to pick just three pearls of wisdom that I learned yesterday they would be:
1. Acceptance does not mean approval.
2. Learn how to accept a compliment.
3. Letting people be who they are and knowing the things that I can change and accepting what and who I cannot change.

Patti and I enjoyed a nice lunch at the Saugerties Diner as well as a wonderful sunshine-y walk to the Saugerties light house on the hudson river! Here are photos of the walk below!






I hope Patti and Cap enjoy their day today in Woodstock, NY. I worked the night shift last night in the ED in Hudson, NY and I am going to a country concert at Hunter Mountain this afternoon into tonight! I think they plan to stay a little longer. We shall see. Each day is a new day and a new plan! I am grateful to have them in my neck of the woods!

Side note... I was deeply affected by the passing of a beautiful soul today, Christina Grimmie. She was a talented, young, truly gifted young woman.  Shot. Killed. Dead. After one of her concerts last night opening for a band called "Before You Exit" The chills that band title gives me.. that her last time ever performing and last day ever living she performs prior to a band called "Before you Exit."  Here is a video of an amazing song she did as a cover. Both Spiritual and beautiful, wishing everyone a beautiful Easter. She truly was an amazing soul.

https://youtu.be/RzseOqwn8oo

One of my favorite songs. She rocks it. She owns it. She reminds us to live each day to the fullest. Step out, Have Courage, Be You, Live with purpose, Live with Passion, Share your Truths. This is exactly what this blog is going to do  for me. A place to share my truths, a place to share my hopes, a place to share my life, my experience. If it helps one person, maybe it will be successful. But I know it will help me, to release my inner writer. So thats enough for me right there. Signing out in hopes of another wonderful day. Despite the rain, I vow to make it a good one. Because I choose happiness today! xoxo Over and Out for Now

~~~Erin